Broken

For the most part, fear is nothing but an illusion. When you share it with someone else, it tends to dissapear

After having a really good weekend, spending time with friends, and a wonderful day at the lake, we came home to find that our house had been burglarized. Upon seeing cords hanging were our tv once was, and our drawers open, with items scattered on the floor, and in the sink, our clothes tossed from drawers, my jewelry boxes gone, and so forth... The instant feeling of disgust and fear was overwhelming. The horror of not knowing where my cat was, and looking for her, and not finding her, and when I finally did, I could not get her to come out from under the bed. My dogs were freaked out, and stressed. What is worse is what these people did to us emotionally. It hurts that they took things that Cory and I have worked together to have, but what hurts even more is they took our sense of security. They just didn't just rob our house they robbed our hearts of trust in people. I can't tell you how awful it feels to be scared in your own home, the place that is supposed to be your comfort zone. Every sound I hear I jump, checking to make sure the doors are locked, worrying that they will come back. I find myself wondering who did this to us, are they still watching us, is it someone we know, and how come this happened. But I know that God is bigger then all of this, and I know that he hears my prayers, and that he will get us through this. Cory told me that all of the stuff they took is God's stuff anyway, and that everything that is really important we still have, Eachother, and our pets. I don't even know if I should be writing about this.. but this is something that has changed me. I look at the pictures on the wall of Cory and I on our wedding day. To me it is two people who joined together to make a life with eachother. Those people didn't see the light of love in our eyes, all they saw was our material things, they disregarded that our home is where we love eachother, where we dream, and make memories. This is a realization that things happen that you never think will happen to you.
We have wonderful friends and family that have been so supportive and loving to us. It feels good to know that we have people in our life who really care about us. And though we may be broken we do have Faith. And having Faith is more then just saying you have it. It is times like this that you have to put that Faith in motion. And we may have been knocked down hard for a moment, but it is our faith in God that is sustaining us. And the initial feelings of shock and disbelief are being healed by the presence of God, and the knowledge that this too will pass.